You been lied to.
They say starve the ego, feed the soul.
But what if I told you this is a paradoxical lie created by the ego.
The ego isn’t the villain. An unhealthy one is.
Let’s start with the basics. What is the ego?
Depends who you ask, But…
At it’s most simplest form the ego is the sense of self.
It gives you a sense of individuality (self image) and self esteem in some spiritual circles they will tell you the self is an illusion but we’re not going to get into that right now.
The ego is actually necessary for our survival but can be destructive if it becomes gluttonous (overinflated) or starving (low-self esteem)
This isn’t about becoming an egomaniac or egoless (not possible) person but how to have a healthy ego.
Learn how & what to feed your ego before it feeds off of you.
THE MOST EXTREMELY TOXIC FOOD FOR THE EGO IS… LIES!
Not the ones we tell others but the ones we tell ourselves.
The problem is most people don’t even realize when they’re doing it.
Self-deception usually sounds reasonable. That’s why that sh!t works.
This is some ways our brain lies to us.
Rationalizing (“It wasn’t that bad.”)
Justifying (“Anyone would’ve done the same.”)
Reframing (“This is actually good or bad for me.”)
Avoiding (“I’ll think about it later.”)
Judgment (“I’m not capable of doing this” “They don’t know what they are talking about”)
The brain 🧠 isn’t built to pursue objective truth. It’s built to protect identity, reduce discomfort, and keep your emotions manageable.
So when reality threatens the ego (“I’m a good or a bad person,” “I know what I’m doing” or “I don’t know what I’m doing.”), the mind quietly edits the story. Not as a knowing lie but a shift in the narrative.
Antidote for the toxicity
Gratitude: Reminding the ego what to be thankful for combats entitlement. It shifts the ego into a reflective mode without realizing. It puts it as ease, taking it out of survival mode as it focuses on what you have rather than what you lack.
[CRUCIAL] We must keep the ego out of survival mode in order for it not reject the antidote. By realizing that accountability is not an attack but the only way to truly grow and improve.
Self-Reflection: A daily dose of self-reflection, helps us examine mistakes. When reflecting look at your action and the why behind them. What are your intentions behind the action and is the impact it’s having on you and others aligned with the intention. You could have good intentions but a bad impact. The key is to see how you are impacting not just yourself but the other around you.
Humility: THIS IS NOT SELF-LOATHING. Admitting our limitations, mistakes and behaviors that contributes to our circumstances but also a willingness to hear and learn from others with a different perspective . An acknowledgment that we don’t know and/or can do it all is crucial. Recognizing there’s value in team work and it’s okay to reach out for help.
Growth: Once we detect our flaws and how they lead to our destructive patterns we can begin acquire the necessary skill sets and tools to make the necessary changes. Our habits and actions should be aligned with your values, goals and purpose.
We want to make sure our ego is being fed a nutritious meal that sustains a healthy self-image that fosters growth.
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