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Keep Your Cool

About 3 years ago I decided to go ghost or monk mode and distance myself from everyone.

It was one of my worst mistakes of my life.

I didn’t realize how destructive it was to your physical and mental health.

I cut off everyone, made a playlist called go ghost and prove everybody wrong.

Then I started slowly realizing it was harder to…
Socialize,
Sleep / Rest,
Recall or remember short term things,
And I was getting more social anxiety.
(Not just when I was high from smoking weed. lol)

I started to regress, and devolve. But why?

Shouldn’t I have gotten better, since I was free from distractions and “negative influence”?

Nope we are social creatures and as much as you wanna act like you’re a lone wolf, monk mode can actually hurt you.

But like everything in life theres a right way and a negative way.

“Monk mode” is internet slang for temporarily cutting out distractions like social media, dating, parties, gaming, sometimes friends to focus completely on work, fitness, healing, or self-improvement.

Basically, you disappear for three months and expect to return with abs, money and no emotional baggage.

But that’s some movie shii.

Solitude and isolation are not the same thing.
And no it’s not just semantics.

Monk mode becomes dangerous when…
“I’m cutting off everyone until I become who I am meant to become.”

You may remove interruptions, but you also remove feedback, affection, accountability and perspective.

Your brain is a social organ.
It did not watch that Gary Vee productivity short where he said friends and relationships are distractions.

Isolation is detrimental
It severely harms both physical and mental health, with effects comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

It increases risks of heart disease, stroke, dementia, and premature death, while causing chronic stress, depression, anxiety, poor sleep, and reduced immune function.

The scientific studies shows…

A five-year study of 229 adults found that “loneliness predicted subsequent changes in depressive symptomatology, but not vice versa.” Isolation is more likely to worsen depression, but sustained loneliness can help move the system in that direction. Read the study.

The body is affected too. A meta-analysis found that social isolation was associated with a 29% higher likelihood of mortality, loneliness with 26% and living alone with 32%. Another analysis of longitudinal data associated poor social relationships with a 29% higher risk of coronary heart disease and a 32% higher risk of stroke. These are associations—not proof that declining brunch once will destroy your cardiovascular system—but they show that connection belongs in the health category, not just the leisure category. Mortality study. Heart and stroke study.

IN OTHER WORDS!!!

Key Negative Effects of Isolation:

1. Name the mission.
Decide what you are distancing yourself for: finishing a project, recovering from burnout or reducing overstimulation. Give the reset an end date. “one day” is not a plan.

2. Cut noise, not connection.
Mute social media, unnecessary notifications and chaotic environments. Keep two or three trusted people accessible. Your support system is not distracting you from the upgrade. It is part of the hardware.

3. Communicate before disappearing.
Tell people, “I’m taking two weeks to focus, but I’m okay.” Boundaries create clarity. Vanishing creates concern, confusion and seven paragraphs in somebody’s Notes app.

4. Make alone time active.
Sleep consistently. Exercise. Get sunlight. Eat actual food. Create something. Solitude becomes dangerous when it turns into lying in the dark, replaying the same thought until it develops a cinematic universe.

5. Schedule re-entry.
Plan a weekly call, meal, class or walk with someone safe. If your sleep, appetite, hygiene, mood or ability to function keeps declining—especially for two weeks or more—end monk mode early and talk with a mental-health professional.

You do not need to be available to everyone.

The goal is NOT to disappear until you become a better person.

The goal is to create enough quiet to hear yourself without abandoning the people who help you remember who you are.

Cause… Old me thought:
“I just need to be tougher.”
“I just need more discipline.”
“I just need to stop being dramatic.” (lol)

New me?
We learning: We need better systems.

So I’m rebuilding in public.
Loser to legend. One patch at a time.

Loser logging off.
Legend loading…

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